


turn it off.

by orphan_account



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: (The pairing is heavily implied.), Internalized Homophobia, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-29 21:35:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11449509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: like a light switch.just go click.





	turn it off.

_

 _He couldn't stop thinking._

Rich cranks the sink on, dipping his hands under the stream. He can't suppress the shivers wracking his body, and stares, mortified. He splashes his face frantically, afterwards moving a hand to hold the sink's edge and the other running through his hair. It's a half-ass attempt to ground himself. 

His vision is blurry, there's drops of water on his lashes, his eyes are red. The SQUIP blinks at the reflection, Rich gags on the resentment building in his throat. 

[ **Rich.** ] 

He forces himself to release his grip, instead washing his face with a new splash of water. Audibly he wheezes, pathetically, and his lungs keeps at it. Rich feels heavy, and leans onto the sink, hands resting on the knobs. The water tapers off, and the SQUIP tsks. It sounds metallic, like someone keying a car, it hurts. 

[ **You're ignoring me.** ] 

Rich moves to smooth down his shirt, and he can feel the SQUIP roll its eyes - _does it even have eyes?_

[ **_Your_ eyes are mine.** ] 

He nods, and turns his attention back to the mirror. _Okay_ , Rich thinks, he looks like he's definitely been crying. His cheeks are harboring a flush, and he blows out an exhausted breath. Countless times and times of exasperation without an outlet is finally taking its toll. 

Crushing his feelings on his own hadn't worked, and Rich grunts in frustration. He'd been having .. _strange feelings_ for Michael. For too long, his emotions were like a dinner stove on low, still there always. He buried it, he had tried. Every set of lips he had kissed, every desperate attempt to keep on track, he had thought of and hoped for - 

He shakes his head at the confusing thoughts, but his mind just continues, rattling off more. 

So, maybe he thinks about Michael again. 

_Rich and Michael together, on a deserted island, each other's only company. The waves would be soft, and the sand underneath them would be warm. It would be awesome. There would be a lean forward from Rich, and the both of their breaths would cross until -_

He moves away from the sink, disgusted with himself. His back meets the bathroom's wall, shoulder bumping against a picture's frame. Rich's breath is thin, he makes the sound of a wounded animal. The SQUIP simply does what it's asked to, almost immediate, when Rich thinks it. 

[ **Are you sure.** ] 

Rich's moving to leave the bathroom, and lets the SQUIP crack open his mind further. Despite its tone being set to default, there's concern underlying. There's a beat of silence as if the SQUIP is hesitant. 

[ **Thought force - redirecting.** ]

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I did this.


End file.
